Call it a craft putter company, or call it a niche putter company. One thing is certain: you won’t call it T-Squared anymore. In a well-attended presser at corporate headquarters, company founder Thelonious Troutman explained the need to move in a different direction:

We’ve been at this for over 3 years now. Any longer, and product identification would have been too difficult to change in the public’s eye. When I founded the company, I was five years old, and thought that my initials would make a nice company moniker. That’s how 5-year olds think. We considered the name T-Cubed, but my middle name is Macadamia, so that wouldn’t have worked. In the end, given the technology we hope to pursue, we unanimously selected T-Curved.

When pressed on the pursuit of new technology, Troutman cited a number of orb-shaped golf products. “From the Orange Whip to the Power Pod, every successful golf club has centered on a circle. Rather than corners, line segments, and angles, we recognized that an infinite circle gives us the best chance at infinite growth. I’m more of a circumference guy, anyway. Who ever uses hypotenuse in the real world?”

Troutman then revealed the first three T-Curved models to be developed by the company. “We really liked how Yes! putters used the names of women in its lines from 2005 to 2015. We decided to honor area golfers by naming putters after them. The first 3 models, each unique in its own right, are named after infamous area golfers, with decidedly-less talent and charisma than I possess.”


The Gabe is the type
of putter that allows
for a smooth stroke,
without getting too
upset at what life
has on offer.

The Carson is the
type of putter that
permits the long hitter
to make up lost strokes
on the putting green.


The Tabosco is for the
fun-loving golfer who 
takes it all in stride, 
yet knows that he can
count on the flat stick.